Nollywood actor, Jim Iyke, has stirred debate after declaring that single mothers cannot raise boys into proper men without the involvement of a male figure.
Speaking in an interview on Okay 101.7 FM, Accra, Ghana, Iyke said a woman needs the assistance of a male figure to raise a man properly.
He said women are naturally built to nurture and love, but may not provide the necessary discipline and guidance.
He said, “A woman can’t raise a man. You can’t, you’re not built for it. A single mother cannot raise a man properly. You need a male influence – go get your brother that’s doing well or your father or even any man that you trust. There has to be a male presence in it [raising a boy child].
“Because women are naturally built to nurture, to love. And then what you’re going to raise is a very weak man? He is going to be everything like the men that left you. You need somebody that would discipline him, tell him ‘No’ as often times as possible, and put him in the grind,” he expressed.
To illustrate his point, Iyke narrated an incident involving his four-year-old son during a family holiday on a beach in the south of France.
According to him, the boy was bullied by his peers, who are white and refused to let him leave with his own football after outplaying him.
“My son is a horrible footballer. I don’t know what gave him the idea because he’s half black, he can’t play football.
“So they dribbled the hell out of my son. He got sick of being dribbled, and he went to grab the ball. It was his ball.
“Now the white kids don’t want him to leave with the ball. There was a scuffle,” the actor recounted.
He said his son ran back crying, but he refused to intervene, even when his wife attempted to step in.
“I didn’t even act like I knew him. I didn’t even turn. So he dragged my shorts… She was from the corner of my eye rushing.
“That is the natural propensity of a woman to go aid him. And I told her, Don’t you dare come near him.
“This is a conversation between two men. Go back to what you’re doing,” Iyke said.
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According to the actor, the boy eventually returned to confront the children, fought them off, and reclaimed his ball.
“So he went back and won a shoot, four against one… He went in there, kicked some ass real quick, pushed down the biggest kid, grabbed his ball and started coming back.
“Now the parent got up and… your kids took my son’s ball. You didn’t lift a finger. Now he’s gone back for war and took his ball back.
“And then now you’re coming. I’ve never been more proud of him then, but that was the spoken understanding between us,” he narrated.
For Iyke, the episode underscored his belief in the importance of a father figure in a boy’s life.
“I’m not here to help you. I’m here to guide you. I’m here to protect you.
“I’m here to provide for you. The rest, you figure it out by yourself. And that’s what makes tough kids.
“That’s my idea of leadership,” Iyke added.
His claim has, however, raised dust, as some people argued that single mothers are perfectly capable of raising well-rounded, independent children.
According to them, with the right support and parenting, single mothers can equip their sons with the skills and values needed to become confident, capable men.